I am in my office sipping tea (that has pahaad jaisa sugar) and am typing this post as my boss is nowhere to be seen today :)
So here we go, given below are my mahaan vichaars on 'BOSS' . Like him or hate him, but you just cannot ignore him. This is my way of paying respects to all those bosses under whom I have worked for two years.
1. All bosses are hari sadus*, but all hari sadus are not bosses
2. Your boss is ON time when you are slightly beyond time
3. Your boss will be late the day when you are ON time
4. You invariably get caught up with extra work on the day you want to leave early (moulin thanks for this.)
5. Your boss will compulsorily suffer from amnesia or short-term memory loss just before the appraisal period
6. The company/boss decides on cost-cutting policies only during the pay hike season
7. Your Facebook page is always open only when your boss comes to your workstation to discuss some top priority work issues
8. Higher the rate of treating your boss with RESPECT, higher are your chances of promotion
9. Higher the rate of arguing, lower are your chances of promotion
10. Your boss always calls for meetings when its 3.30 PM and when you are in a mood for afternoon siesta.
11. Your boss is equally a frustrated soul as you.
*-If you have seen the Naukri.com ad, you will know who Hari Sadu is. For those who have not seen it, Hari Sadu is a kadoos boss who loves to iltreat his employees. Later on, the employee gets back at him by calling him hitler, arrogant, rascal and idiot under the pretext of spelling his name.
P.S: I need to admit, my current boss is nothing like what I have mentioned above. He is one of those rare bosses who treat their employees with respect. If you have any inputs to add, do feel free to do so.
Hehehehehe!! Lol! Too good, yaar
ReplyDeleteLet me show this to my boss. :-)
Nahi yaar parikshith...I obviously dont want my fellow blogger friends (and potential investors for my ccd) to loose their jobs :)
ReplyDeletehahaha... sach main!
ReplyDeleteMy boss doesn't fit in all the points but a boss is a boss after all.. you can't crack a joke on him when he's around!
and yeah he is always late when you reach the office early!
hehe!
you have a bad boss!
ReplyDeleteand does he/she read your blog?
I used to swear at my boss in my posts. One day while introducing me to some of his peers of some other dept, he said "She writes very well. Very talented". Khallas!!!!!
ReplyDeletehehhee!
ReplyDeleteits good u put that post script thing, we never know which way a boss may turn!
i love that Hari Sadu ad :P
i wanna add something similar as the rule on facebook u've mentioned...i was fully loaded with work one day but somehow managed to squeeze in a little time for Naukri.com, my bloody manager popped into my desk that very moment to take a status update...if it wasnt enough embarassment already, this happened again at the end of the day....luckily some saving grace was that i had finished the load!
Always open Naukri.com when ur boss is on vacation:)
another additon...BOSS <-> SSOB (Stupid Son of a B****)
cool vichaars n keep them coming...
Hey the starting was too good. Superb yaar. Very hilarious.
ReplyDeleteI love the Hari Sadu ad!! Thank heavens my bosses were not that type!! i always had kool bosses (one of the lucky one's!)
ReplyDelete"Your boss always calls for meetings when its 3.30 PM and when you are in a mood for afternoon siesta."
So true..time and time again!!
i hope ur boss sees the P.S thingy, u will be promoted immediately!
cheers
rammy
and yea.. removed the captcha!!!!
ReplyDeleteway to go!!
By God !!! what a post mortem.... hahahahah
ReplyDeleteNice one!!! By the way you are always on time !!! hena
Regards
Sandeep
My boss is also not at all like that... But he "had" a very notorious anger management problem. So no one in the company, even his superiors was afraid of him :P and wont cross him.
ReplyDeleteWe got used to this, "occasionally-going-ballistic". But now a days, i guess he going to some yoga or anger management classes... :(
he is not at all going berserk
abhinav...yeah my boss is a nice man too touchwood :)
ReplyDeletechriz...my boss is a nice man, touch wood. And no he does not read my blogs.
rum...probably he was happy about the fact that u think he is good looking.
vinnie...hahaha this incident has happend to me too. Boss never come when we are seriously working, they always come when we are NOT working.
moulin, thanks buddy
rammy...congrats first and foremost for completing 2 years in ur org. i hope my boss reads my PS part ;)
sandeep...thanks buddy. and no i am never ON time.
vaisakh...awww i wonder why bosses have a bad temper. Anyways its good naa that he is not throwing temper tantrums. y on the earth r u sad about that?
missin the old "bombastic" boss. :P
ReplyDeleteit was fun back then ... ;)
ah! mebbe i shd blog abt my office capers! :)
ReplyDeleteThanks 4 d gyaan GV as always tamatar phenkne waala hun :D
Hilarious :).
ReplyDeleteIt gives me shivers though that some of my team-members might be having similiar opinions about me.
THough , I agree about the facebook thing and some more :).
LOL..I completely agree with the amnesia thing.
ReplyDeleteAnd I have faced the brunt of number 10 so many times that i now have chngd my nap time to 2.30 ;)
Vaisakh P S, i am quite surprised that you liked your angry boss so much that u miss his temper now.
ReplyDeleteD...arre yaar i m on a high protein diet so please throw eggs at me. BTW i am waiting for your post on adventures in office...jaldi likho
brown phantom...thanks a lot...that facebookwala scene is universal. everybody faces it. err...u r a boss...i hope u r like my boss...cool and chilled out banda.
shanu...i have still not learnt a lesson. i still sleep at 3.30 and the biggest problem is that the meeting room is always dim lit (mainly b'coz they have these ppt presentations at tht time)...so tht mkes me all the more sleepy :(
@
@Gaya3
ReplyDeleteits coz he was and is still a standup guy. no matter what ever and how ever things are stacked up against our team, he would be on our side and would understand us.
that why we like him :)
p.s- ever had a female boss? I would soooooooo get that to work for me!!!
ReplyDeleteThe day you are ON time and the boss is late...well, he sees that as the day you came too early, and unnecessarily used up office resources like A/C,lights and coffee machine for free...
ReplyDeletehi bullshee...thankfully i always come late and leave early, hence the question of using office resources does not really arise atleast not in my case :)
ReplyDeleteand yes i had a female boss who reminded me of Miranda priestly from devil wears prada. Actually you can be sure of a kurukshetra battle if both the boss and the subordinate are females
Your BOSS decides to work from home when everyone else are at office on the day weekly meeting is scheduled!!!
ReplyDeletethis just happened today
Nice ones pal...Enjoyed reading them...
Insignia...bosses make and break their own rules...thanks for visiting my blog. I went through your's too...liked it quite a lot. Will get back there when u write the next post.
ReplyDeleteLOL... That was a really good one!!! All bosses are hari sadus*, but all hari sadus are not bosses :D
ReplyDeletethanks kido :)
ReplyDelete1) Havent met an Hari Sadu :(
ReplyDelete2)Boss doesnt care, only HR does
3)I dont care, only HR does :D
4)"The subscriber you are calling is out of coverage area", this is the tune that the boss hears after office time :D
5)Still time for appraisal :)
6)Cost cutting resulted in cutting std outgoing calls from office phone :(
7)Blogger is always open and the boss is blogger illiterate :D
8)I just dont care, we are always at war :D
9)I just cant control ;) I always have my way :D
10)I miss the meetings as it used to be nap times for me ;)
11)Not equally but more :D
quest what brilliant answers man...
ReplyDeleteG3 G3 bore lagi. Bakwaas chahiye mujhe abhi :-P
ReplyDelete(Don't tell me "abey bakwaas chahiye toh khud likh na, saale" )
When's the next post coming up?:-)
arre yaar parikshith...bakwaas likhne kaa toh daily mood rehta hain...but office mein kaam karna (i.e. acting karna) padta hain aur ghar pe net bandh hain...but fikar not balak...i will write a bakwaas post this weekend. topic bhi soch liya hain maine...bas likhke tujhe barabar paka dalungi :)
ReplyDeletehiiii
ReplyDeletehehehe!
yaar wo hari sadhu wala ad was mast just like ur new post!!
thanks AS...was waiting 4 ur comments only
ReplyDeleteNice blog. How about a boss who changes his/her mind every few minutes and thus preventing you from progressing in your project. How about a boss who takes credit for your work. Worst, how about a boss who doesn't have guts to tell on your face that your performance is not satisfactory to him/her. Instead say, "I think you are an OK performer, but my boss thinks you are not".
ReplyDeleteHahaha... Loved the Hari Sadu bit!
ReplyDeleteI always crack up during that Ad.
Hilarious!! :)
#9 should read, "The more you argue with your boss, the more likely you'll be needing Naukri's services very soon."
ReplyDeleteAnd since 12 points looks way cooler than 11, "12) If you happen to have a public blog where you trash bosses in general, it is a good idea to add a post script praising your own."
Just kidding... :D
SG...cool inputs yaar...will include them when i write a continuation of this post...hehehe I guess we can almost write a book on it, what say?
ReplyDeletegkam, Hari Sadu ad is my fav too...he is the true symbol of real boss.
rohan, I guess I have added the PS in which i praised my own boss...and guess what, my boss saw the post and asked me if the PS was added just as a buffer or whether i really meant it :)